# Who sits at the top table at a wedding? > Who sits at the top table at a UK wedding, the traditional order, modern alternatives, layouts and what to do with divorced parents, plus how to plan it. Source: https://seatingsolver.com/top-table-wedding/ · As of: 2026-11-02 · Seating Solver At a traditional UK wedding, the couple sit in the middle of the top table, with the wedding party and parents on either side. Plenty of couples do it differently, and that is fine. Below are the traditional order, the modern options, the layouts and how to handle tricky family situations. ## Key points - Traditionally the top table seats the couple in the middle, with the best man and chief bridesmaid (or maid of honour) beside them and both sets of parents further out. - Modern top tables are often a wedding party table, a table for the two of you (a sweetheart table), or no top table at all. - Seat the people giving speeches where they can reach the microphone easily, and put anyone you would rather not seat together at different ends or at a different table. - In Seating Solver the top table is called the Head table. It is filled only with guests you place there yourself, and you can ask for other guests to be seated near it. ## The traditional top table order Bridebook’s UK guide describes the traditional arrangement like this: the couple sit in the middle. Working outwards on the bride’s side come the maid of honour (or chief bridesmaid), the bride’s mum, then the bride’s dad. On the groom’s side come the best man, the groom’s mum, then the groom’s dad. The same guide also gives a mixed version, with the best man and the groom’s mum on the bride’s side and the maid of honour and the bride’s mum on the groom’s side, so that the two families are spread along the table. Orders differ between families, venues and sources, so treat this as a starting point, not a rule. The only real test is whether the table works for the people on it. ## Modern alternatives to the traditional top table ### Wedding party table The couple, the best man, chief bridesmaid, ushers and bridesmaids, with parents seated at their own tables. Everyone on it is someone you want next to you all day. ### Sweetheart table A table for just the two of you. It gives you a moment together and avoids choosing who sits at the top table. You then seat parents and the wedding party at the tables nearest to you. ### Family top table The couple and both sets of parents, with the wedding party at a table beside it. Useful when parents are hosting or you are very close to them. ### Mixed in with guests No top table at all. You sit at a normal table with friends or family, which can feel more relaxed. Check that the speakers can still reach the microphone, and tell your venue. ### People you choose Friends, siblings, grandparents or anyone who matters to you, whatever the tradition says. Same-sex couples and anyone who does not want the traditional roles can seat whoever they like. ## Top table layouts ### Long top table One long table with everyone seated on one side facing the room, so that all guests can see you. This is the classic layout and it works in most venues. Check that its length fits the width of the room. ### Seats on both sides A long table with people on both sides and the couple at the centre of one side. Everyone can talk to each other more easily, but some people have their backs to the room. ### Sweetheart table A small table for two, placed where the room can see you, for example against a window or a decorated backdrop. ### Round top table A large round table at the front of the room. It is more sociable than a long row, but the people on the far side face away from the guests, so some couples leave that side empty. ### Raised platform Some venues put the top table on a stage or step so everyone can see it. Ask the venue about steps for older guests and for anyone with limited mobility. ## Divorced parents, step-parents and blended families This is the part people worry about most, and there is no single right answer. These approaches work for many couples. - **Talk to the people involved first.** A short call or message avoids surprises on the day. Ask what they would be comfortable with, then decide. - **Seat divorced parents at separate tables.** Each parent gets a table near the top table, with their own partner and family. - **Put them at opposite ends.** If you want everyone at the top table, leave several seats, such as the couple and the wedding party, between them. - **Include step-parents, or give them the next table.** If a step-parent helped raise you, they can sit at the top table. If it would cause tension, a table beside the top table works, as long as both families are treated the same way. - **Keep both sides balanced.** Give each side the same number of seats and a similar position, so nobody feels ranked. - **Keep it simple.** A kind, simple choice that you explain beforehand is better than a clever one. ## How big should the top table be? - **Allow room per person.** As a rough rule of thumb, plan about 60 to 75 cm (2 to 2.5 ft) of table length for each person. Ask your venue for the exact table sizes. - **Decide the numbers first.** Count the couple plus the people you really want next to you. A small top table often feels warmer than a very long one. - **Leave room for decorations.** Flowers, candles and the cake knife all take space, so a top table that looks big on paper can feel crowded. - **Think about who has to get up.** Put the people giving speeches near the end that is closest to the microphone. - **Check the sightlines.** Make sure the table can be seen from the guest tables and that staff can still pass behind it. ## How to plan the top table in Seating Solver 1. Open the **Tables** tab and add your guest tables. For the top table, use **Add head table**, or add a single table with the **long**, **round** or **square** shape and the number of seats you need. In Seating Solver the top table is called the **Head table**. 2. Add your guests. For anyone who should sit close to the top table, such as grandparents, open the guest’s **Details** and choose **Near the Head table**. 3. Seat the people who belong at the top table yourself, by dragging them to a seat or tapping a guest and then a seat, and pin them with the lock. The Head table is only filled with guests you place there; the solver does not put anyone else on it. 4. Seat everyone else with the solver. It fills the other tables and tries to place the guests who asked to be near the Head table as close to it as it can. 5. Move tables around on the **Plan** tab until the room looks right. A sweetheart table is simply a table with two seats. Seating Solver does not draw a raised platform, so for a stage, add the table as a normal one and tell the venue about the platform separately. It is free to use and works without an account. For the whole flow, see the [guide to making a wedding seating chart](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-seating-chart/), or the [wedding table plan page](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-table-plan/). ## Name the top table and print the cards Your top table can have a name, too. Try your surnames or just “Top table”, and print it with the others. See the [table name ideas](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-table-names/) and the [printable place cards](https://seatingsolver.com/place-cards/). ## Top table questions ### Who sits at the top table at a wedding? Traditionally the bride and groom in the middle, with the best man and the maid of honour (or chief bridesmaid) beside them and the parents further out. Many couples now choose a wedding party table, a table for two or no top table. ### Who sits on the top table at a UK wedding? The couple, the best man, the chief bridesmaid or maid of honour, and often both sets of parents. Ushers and bridesmaids sometimes sit there too, or at a table beside it. ### Do parents have to sit at the top table? No. Parents often sit at their own tables near the top table, especially when they are divorced or you want more room for the wedding party. ### What if my parents are divorced? Seat each parent at a separate table near the top table, with their own partner and family, or put them at opposite ends of the top table with the wedding party in between. Talk to them beforehand. ### Can the bride and groom sit on their own? Yes. A sweetheart table for the two of you is a popular choice. Seat parents and the wedding party at the nearest tables. ### Where do the bridesmaids and ushers sit? Either at the top table next to the couple, or at a wedding party table beside it. ### Do we need a top table at all? No. You can sit at a normal guest table. Make sure the people giving speeches can reach the microphone, and tell the venue. ### Can Seating Solver plan a top table? Yes, it is called the Head table. You add it as a table, seat the people on it yourself, and mark other guests as wanting a seat near it. Seating Solver is free to use and works without an account. ## Keep reading - [In the US, see head table](https://seatingsolver.com/head-table-wedding/) - [Wedding table plan (UK)](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-table-plan/) - [How to make a wedding seating chart](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-seating-chart/) - [Wedding table names](https://seatingsolver.com/wedding-table-names/) - [Printable place cards](https://seatingsolver.com/place-cards/)